How to Call in What You Need in 2021
It’s December 20th. That means you're about to be bombarded with "resolutions!" content from every corner of the internet. And I hope you're ready to ignore most of what you come across.
We are ALL chomping at the bit to make 2021 less of a nightmare than 2020 has been—but in order to do so, we've got to reframe the way we think about resolutions.
Today we're going to talk about how to connect your "why" to your goals for 2021, which is going to make all your efforts stickier.
No more empty resolutions. This year, we are bringing mindful intention back into the fold—and I've included a printable worksheet at the bottom of this email for extra ease!
finding your why: and why it matters
11 years ago, Simon Sinek went viral for his TedTalk titled, "Start With Why." Back in 2009, his words were revolutionary. Every tech CEO forced their employees to watch it with strict instructions that everything their brand outputted from that moment forward had to connect to their why, or else. (At least, my CEO did—but he wouldn't have if this video hadn't completely enraptured everyone in his Silicon Valley network).
Here's the thing: it is a great message. But it's applicable beyond building a company mission statement. It's applicable for YOU.
Finding your "why" is essentially naming your purpose. What's the motivation behind your actions?
And if you've been with me for a while, you know... humans are motivated by our needs!
In fact, psychologist Abraham Maslow coined his famous 'hierarchy of needs' model, which is still widely used today, in his 1943 paper, "A theory of HUMAN MOTIVATION."
The whole reason we have this model is because we were trying to understand what motivates us.
So needs aren't these pesky parts of ourselves that are poor, deprived, or obnoxiously greedy—although I hate that the word "needy" is a synonym for all three because it sure confuses us to think they are!
No, needs are impulses that in their most basic form compel you to survive and in their most advanced form help you to thrive. You need water? You get thirsty. You need shelter? You learn to build a house (or, in today's era, apply for a job). You need joy? You find a way to laugh.
Everything you think, do, and feel are a direct response to what you're needing in the moment.
This becomes more obvious the longer you spend learning to name your needs. It's like, "oh yeah, I did randomly reach out to Rebecca today because I had a need for connection." or "oh, right, I guess I did feel really sad after that performance review because I have a need for recognition and it wasn't met."
In other words: "finding your why" is synonymous with "naming your needs." And today we're going to name the needs you MOST want to meet in 2021.
naming your top 5 needs: for 2021
Think ahead to next year: let your mind bring up what you'd like to see come to fruition, evolve, or even fall away. Take some time to relish in the vision you have for this next trip around the sun.
Then print-out the worksheet I've attached below, which includes a list of the most common human needs, and circle the needs that pop off the page to you. Usually when we have a need—even if we don't know it—there will be a soft physical response that we have to seeing the word on a page. So notice what happens in your body when you skim through these needs.
And of course circle any needs you know you want to meet in 2021. For example, if you are dreaming of learning a new skill, look for the need that you think will be met by learning that skill. Maybe it's as simple as "growth" or "learning"—but it could also be "self-expression" or "play" or even "beauty." It's your need, so you'll know what speaks to you loudest.
When you're done circling, write them all out in the space provided, and then circle the 5 that speak to you the loudest of them all.
print your free worksheet: two pages to play with
next week: drafting strategies to meet your needs
If you're one of those people who likes to jump ahead (hi, same)—you can start this process today! In the space provided on page 2 of the worksheet, brainstorm between 1-3 strategies you can enact in order to meet each need in 2021.
Next week we'll focus on refining those strategies (with an additional worksheet) so you have a Plan A and a much easier Plan B in case life gets in the way.
We want to make meeting these needs as accessible as possible for you. So strategize away! But know that meeting the need is the goal here—that's the feel-good, life-giving elixir we're trying to cultivate in 2021. The strategy, or path we take to get there, is less important—it's adaptable. It is fluid. It can change.
There will be no such thing as "failing" to meet your needs in 2021—there will only be "adapting new strategies" to get there. This why the resolution model needs a reboot. Resolution people get too stuck to their strategies. But if you stay connected to your why, you'll make it happen no matter the path.
Thanks so much for tuning in. If you found this email useful, please consider sharing with like-minded friends who are interested in self-connection, expansion, growth, and all sorts of other wellness buzzwords. ;)